The "I Forgot to Tell Brian Happy Valentines Day. Oh No!!", edition.

iPad shuffled to Frank Sinatra, "Lady Luck". I'm picking Frank singing this over Marlon Brando talking it through with a bad gangster accent (Guys and Dolls ).  One of my favorite movies. Quick insurance update.  I got a letter from Blue Cross indicating they needed more information...see checked items.  Of course there were no checked items just a stray statement saying I have ESRD.  I'd like to think this was taken care of when Blue Cross called on Tuesday.  However I called Blue Cross, just in case. The representative pulled up my file and was just as puzzled as I.  She asked for proof of previous insurance. Dunno what that has to do with anything. She then asked the bonus question. When did I enroll in the previous program. WTF?  I. Don't. Know.  Anyway, we guessed ( it's a long story ).  She did understand the urgency, but has to forward the file and application to a specialist. I should hear back next week.  Needless to say I'm keeping my cell phone close to me. *sigh*.

Yes, I made it all the way to treatment and I forgot to tell Brian Happy Valentines Day.  I did kiss him and tell him I love him. But I do that everyday. Often.  :)   He's my husband, my friend, my partner, the love of my life, my cheerleader....the list can go on.  He's also my caregiver. Never saw that one coming.  But here we are. I alluded to it a few days ago when I mentioned he had to dress me.  I fought it, but he wouldn't let me. >:-(    When I wanted a shower, he was there holding me up and helping me. He helped me up and down stairs.  When I thought I could get on the floor and then couldn't get up, he was there.  He cooked me renal safe meals. He went shopping for clothes for me because nothing fit. He listens when I rage about my kidney failure. He assures me it's ok to rage.  He would pull up to standing when I didn't have the strength to even stand up. 

The Jackson's, "The Way to Go".  He wipes my tears. He makes me laugh. He gets up at 5AM to drive me to treatment ... Even though I assured him I can do it.  Lol. I had trouble buying him Christmas gifts because he insisted on driving me to the store, then following me around. Lol. I know that sounds odd, but since I've had episodes of low blood pressure and almost passing out, he likes to be nearby. He reassures me I look pretty, even when I'm feeling really punky. He'll walk by and greet me with a "Hey sexy". I'm not sure he realizes how much he lifts my spirits. :)  He retired a few months early to take care of me. 

I'm considering home hemodialysis.  He volunteered to learn how to stick me. When we travel and it need dialysis,  he'll wait in the waiting room for 4+ hours for me....unless we're in Vegas, then it's off to Arizona Charlie's. Lol.  Heart, "Crazy on You".   Liking the guitars at the beginning.  He does so much. He's the ultimate caregiver....and supporter.  By him doing so much for me, I felt the need to ease his burden.  It was important to me to not be so weak. Both Brian and Shawn called me frail. That horrified me. I've always been strong. My job was to ease up on my dependency on Brian. I felt like I was working him to death.  But you know what he said?  He told me he loved me and that was exactly what he wanted to do.   .....

So everyday is Valentines Day in our house.  But when he picks me up,you better believe I will tell the love of my life Happy Valentines Day!!!!

No sign off song because there was no WiFi this morning, but I'd set it to Al green, "Let's Stay Together".  Have a wonderful day and a wonderful weekend!!!